Blast from the past

Nearly half a lifetime ago, I wrote a little book. It was never published, never seen, in fact, by anyone but one of my close friends and her boyfriend at the time. I made two copies - one for this boyfriend of hers and one for myself, pink and heart-shaped, with a Lisa Frank sticker of two tropical fishes kissing on the back cover - then tucked mine away. For years.

It appeared again the other day, this little book, sent back in the mail from a time in my past when I had shared it with someone else. And I chuckled at first when I saw it, rolling my eyes at my girlishness, at the ridiculousness of a young teenager contemplating things with which she clearly had no experience. Then I opened it and read, wondering if I didn't, perhaps, know something after all, those many years ago.

The 15 most important tips for being a successful boyfriend

1. Learn to be romantic [of course I would have put this first. At least I understood then, in part, that this must often be learned].

2. Tell her once in awhile that you think she's beautiful (but only if you really mean it)!

3. Watch "girly" movies on some occasions just to show her you care about the things she enjoys.

4. Go out on fun inexpensive dates.

5. Always be honest and open with each other.

6. Don't get too carried away with being physical - it can wreck a good relationship.

7. Not only are you her boyfriend; you are her best friend!

8. Realize that it's also important for you to do guy things and her do girl things with buds.

9. Money isn't everything, expensive doesn't mean better. It's the special little things you do that mean the most.

10. Be not only a good talker, but a good listener, too.

11. Girls LOVE surprises!!

12. Good communication is a key part of any relationship [Look at me, a pop psychologist in the making].

13. Sometimes a hug can say more than words.

14. If you respect her for her morals, values, and beliefs, she'll respect yours in return.

15. Most importantly, keep God in the focus of your relationship.

Experience can make us wiser, this is true; but the booklet is a good reminder for me that fresh, un-jaded eyes can also see without the aid of experience.